Biologically speaking, we know fear exists to protect us from harm. Socially, on the other hand, this dynamic gets a bit more complicated. What are we protecting ourselves from when we don’t take career risks? Or when we decide not to speak up during a work meeting? Gender stereotypes add yet another layer to the problem. That’s why we want to talk about recognizing and taming fear when you are a woman in tech. What social norms are leaving women behind in the tech world and how can we overcome them?
In many cultures, women are not encouraged to try and fail. This starts in the kids playground when girls are told to take care, mind their manners and fix their clothes a lot more often than boys. We grew up thinking we have to be perfect (clean, quiet, pretty) not to ever displease anyone. The restrictive mindset continues throughout life and women are continuously led to “risk free” options in life and career. We grow up afraid.
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Taming fear: it isn’t always your fault
When women choose to venture in the tech industry it’s like worlds colliding. The market for “leaders”, “innovators”, “people who think outside the box”. Those are exactly the qualities we were told not to have. We are left out!
Amazingly enough, sometimes we even feel like it\’s our own fault. But it’s not. If you were raised to be “perfect” and there was never room for experimentation, you will be afraid to step into risky situations. The trick here is not to beat yourself up, but to learn how to recognize when fear is helping you or hurting you.
https://blog.vanhack.com/blog/lets-break-excluding-stereotypes-to-strengthen-women-in-technology/
Avoiding fear hurts women’s careers
American two-time Olympic champion Abby Wambach says:
“We’ve been living by the old rules that insist that a woman must be perfect before she’s worthy of showing up. Since no one is perfect, this rule is an effective way to keep women out of leadership preemptively”.
She is right. A LinkedIn Gender Insights Report shows that women apply for 20% fewer jobs than men — despite having similar search behaviors. Unlike male candidates, females will only apply to jobs if they’re 100% confident about their qualifications. Women are also 16% less likely to apply for an opportunity after viewing it and 26% less likely to ask for a referral.
https://blog.vanhack.com/blog/perfectionism-holds-women-back/
Taming fear to advance
Waiting till you are 100% at anything might mean you will never be ready. No, we are not saying women should apply to every job opportunity they come across, and we are definitely not advocating for a reckless life in general. But there is a lot between taking meaningless risks and being stuck because you are not “perfect”.
Writer Lauren Bailey posted about how she is teaching herself to recognize fear and tame it. She says:
“Here’s the lesson: Double check your excuses. And your reasons. And your logic. And your priority list. See if there isn’t something your heart really wants pushed to the bottom of the list and then coach yourself to recognize the placement as fear. When you do, try repeating this: I’m going to go for it. The worst that could happen is nowhere near as big as the best that can happen”.
https://blog.vanhack.com/blog/empowering-women-to-apply-for-tech-jobs-abroad/
Dealing with fear and daring to grow
So, ask yourself: what is the best that can happen if you put yourself up for career opportunities?
The imposed need for perfection so many of us grew up with is now hurting us. Let’s try our best to overcome it and help others do the same. Take it from Wambach once again:
“Imperfect men have been empowered and permitted to run the world since the beginning of time. It\’s time for imperfect women to grant themselves permission to join them”.
Join the women in tech hiring event
Our job is to bridge the gap between growing companies and skilled professionals. We have been doing this for seven years and have helped over 1800 tech talents around the globe. Our next frontier now is to get more women among those who get hired with our help.
Join our next Women In Tech Hiring Event that will take place October 27th.
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